<?xml version='1.0' encoding='UTF-8'?><?xml-stylesheet href="http://www.blogger.com/styles/atom.css" type="text/css"?><feed xmlns='http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom' xmlns:openSearch='http://a9.com/-/spec/opensearchrss/1.0/' xmlns:georss='http://www.georss.org/georss' xmlns:gd='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005' xmlns:thr='http://purl.org/syndication/thread/1.0'><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153</id><updated>2011-07-26T02:35:22.375-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Anger Sarcasm and Scoff</title><subtitle type='html'>I have been often told that I march to my own drummer.  This blog is dedicated to my own little take on the world.  Enjoy!</subtitle><link rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#feed' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/posts/default'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default?max-results=100'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/'/><link rel='hub' href='http://pubsubhubbub.appspot.com/'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><generator version='7.00' uri='http://www.blogger.com'>Blogger</generator><openSearch:totalResults>17</openSearch:totalResults><openSearch:startIndex>1</openSearch:startIndex><openSearch:itemsPerPage>100</openSearch:itemsPerPage><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-1782900506708160681</id><published>2009-10-29T13:32:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2009-10-30T07:54:12.880-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Towing in New Jersey</title><content type='html'>I haven't blogged in a while but my stat counter seems to be going up.  It seems that many of you have come across my blog because you are looking for information on towing in NJ. This is probably because some dumb fuck prick asshole towed your car. A while back I had a run in with one of these useless tampons and &lt;a href="http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2007/01/tow-stapo.html"&gt;wrote about it&lt;/a&gt;, so I totally feel your pain.  Anyway, I have taken it upon myself to give YOU, yes YOU a little more info then you had before you got here.  Maybe you might even feel compelled to read some of my favorite posts that I've written. Some predate this blog and were posts on &lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/"&gt;my best friend's blog&lt;/a&gt;.  I highly recommend reading some of his stuff.  He is VERY funny.  Don't worry, the stuff on the towing is below, but you can't blame me for plugging my blog while I have a captive audience.  Maybe, just maybe i'll feel compelled to start writing again if I think that there is anyone reading it.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/2006/05/guest-blog-2.html"&gt;An angry rant about how much I hate receipts!&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/2006/06/guest-blog-4.html"&gt;An angry rant about how much I hate James Blunt!&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2008/01/extra-extra-ass-returns.html"&gt;Some random things that make me angry including my complete rejection of "Customer with Child" parking!&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/12/blind-leading-blind.html"&gt;An amusing tale of blind people and hunting&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/2006/05/guest-blog-3.html"&gt;A little rant about people who clap at the end of movies&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;DISCLAIMER:  I am not a lawyer and this is not legal advice.  I am simply another pissed of citizen that did some research on the subject and the following is what I found.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;There is wording from 3 different laws below:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. 39:4-56.6 (The law that says you can be towed)&lt;br /&gt;2. 40:48-2.49 (Regulation of operators engaged in removal of motor vehicles)&lt;br /&gt;3. 56:13-23 (Predatory Towing Prevention Act)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1) The following is the statute that says that the wife beater wearing, crystal meth snorting prick can tow you:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;39:4-56.6.      Abandonment of vehicle on private property; removal by owner of property; costs; sale of vehicle&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;br /&gt;No person shall park or leave unattended a vehicle on private property without the consent of the owner or other person in control or possession of the property or for a period in excess of that for which consent was given, except in the case of emergency or disablement of the vehicle in which case the owner or operator thereof shall arrange for the expeditious removal of the vehicle. This section shall not apply to manufactured or mobile homes left unattended and for which there exists or existed a rental agreement to occupy a space on the property.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Subject to the requirements of section 7 of P.L.2007, c.193 (C.56:13-13), the owner or other person in control or possession of the property on which a vehicle is parked or left unattended in violation of this section may remove or hire another person to remove and store the vehicle. It shall be the obligation of the owner of the vehicle to pay the reasonable costs for the removal and for any storage which may result from such removal before he shall be entitled to recover the possession of the vehicle. If the owner of the vehicle refuses to pay such costs or fails to make any claim for the return of the vehicle within 90 days after such removal, the vehicle may be sold at public auction in accordance with the provisions of N.J.S.2A:44-20 through N.J.S.2A:44-31.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L.1973, c.137, s.1; amended 1999, c.340, s.10; 2007, c.1993, s.22.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2) This one regulates the ex-high school football star, although he probably isn't smart enough to understand the regulations so that's good for us.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40:48-2.49 Regulation of operators engaged in removal of motor vehicles.&lt;br /&gt;Notwithstanding the provisions of section 1 of P.L.1973, c.137 (C.39:4-56.6) or any other law, a municipality may regulate, by ordinance, the removal of motor vehicles from private or public property by operators engaged in such practice, including, but not limited to, the fees charged for storage following removal in accordance with section 3 of P.L.1987, c.127 (C.40:48-2.50), fees charged for such removal, notice requirements therefor, and the mercantile licensing of such operators.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The ordinance shall set forth non-discriminatory and non-exclusionary regulations&lt;br /&gt;governing operators engaged in the business of removing and storing motor vehicles.&lt;br /&gt;The regulations shall include, but not be limited to:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. A schedule of fees or other charges which an operator may charge vehicle owners for towing services, storage services or both;&lt;br /&gt;b. Minimum standards of operator performance, including but not limited to&lt;br /&gt;standards concerning the adequacy of equipment and facilities, availability and&lt;br /&gt;response time, and the security of vehicles towed or stored;&lt;br /&gt;c. The designation of a municipal officer or agency to enforce the provisions of&lt;br /&gt;the ordinance in accordance with due process of law;&lt;br /&gt;d. The requirement that such regulations and fee schedules of individual towers&lt;br /&gt;shall be made available to the public during normal business hours of the&lt;br /&gt;municipality.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L.1979,c.101,s.1; amended 1987, c.127, s.2; 1991, c.142, s.3; 1997, c.387, s.1.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40:48-2.50. Fee limits All fees to be paid to an operator by a municipality for the storage of removed motor vehicles shall not exceed the following:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) A limit of $3.00 per day for the first 30 days of storage per vehicle; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) A limit of $2.00 per day for the 31st day of storage and any day thereafter; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(3) A limit of $400.00 per vehicle stored regardless of the duration of the&lt;br /&gt;storage, except that a waiver may be granted for good cause upon the request of a&lt;br /&gt;municipality by the Division of Local Government Services in the Department of&lt;br /&gt;Community Affairs.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L. 1987, c. 127, s. 3.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40:48-2.51. Penalty for violation of fee limits An operator engaged in the removal of motor vehicles, or any employee, officer or agent thereof, who engages in a pattern or practice of knowingly violating the fee limits set in section 3 of P.L.1987, c. 127 (C. 40:48-2.50) may be liable to the municipality for a civil penalty of not less than $25.00 or more than $50.00 for each motor vehic le stored with the operator.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L. 1987, c. 127, s. 4.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40:48-2.54 Model schedule of towing, storage services adopted by municipality,&lt;br /&gt;county.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. The governing body of a municipality or county which requires the towing and&lt;br /&gt;storage of motor vehicles without the consent of the owners of those vehicles shall adopt an ordinance or resolution, as appropriate, setting forth a model schedule of towing and storage services which they require and the rates therefor, which rates shall be based on the usual, customary and reasonable rates of operators towing and storing motor vehicles in the municipality or county, as applicable.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. The governing body of every municipality or county setting forth a schedule of&lt;br /&gt;services and rates pursuant to subsection a. of this section shall implement a procedure to receive complaints and resolve disputes arising from the towing and storage of motor vehicles required by that municipality or county without the consent of the owner.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L.1997,c.387,s.3.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40:48-2.55 Model schedule of towing, storage services adopted by Division of&lt;br /&gt;Consumer Affairs.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. The Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety&lt;br /&gt;may establish a model schedule of towing and storage services identifying those services for which a fee may be charged by the governing body of a municipality or county. This model schedule, if established, shall be provided, upon request, to any municipality or county.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. Each governing body that is required to adopt a resolution or ordinance pursuant to section 3 of P.L.1997, c.387 (C.40:48-2.54) shall submit its schedule of services and rates for the towing and storage of motor vehicles to the Division of Consumer Affairs for review within 90 days of the effective date of this act, or within 90 days of the adoption of that ordinance or resolution, whichever is later.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L.1997,c.387,s.4.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;56:8-2.26 Charging of discriminatory, unusual rates for towing, storage.&lt;br /&gt;It shall be an unlawful practice and a violation of P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.) for any person to charge rates which are discriminatory or are not usual, customary and reasonable rates for the towing and storage of motor vehicles as provided in section 3 of P.L.1997, c.387 (C.40:48-2.54).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;L.1997,c.387,s.5.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;40A:11-5 Exceptions Any contract the amount of which exceeds the bid threshold, may be negotiated and awarded by the governing body without public advertising for bids and bidding therefor and shall be awarded by resolution of the governing body if:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) The subject matter thereof consists of:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;…(u) Contracting unit towing and storage contracts, provided that all such contracts shall be pursuant to reasonable non-exclusionary and non-discriminatory terms and conditions, which may include the provision of such services on a rotating basis, at the rates and charges set by the municipality pursuant to section 1 of P.L.1979, c.101 (C.40:48-2.49). All contracting unit towing and storage contracts for services to be provided at rates and charges other than those established pursuant to the terms of this paragraph shall only be awarded to the lowest responsible bidder in accordance with the provisions of the "Local Public Contracts Law" and without regard for the value of the contract therefor;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3) This last one is the predatory towing act.  It attempts to set rules, but I don't think it's restrictive enough.  I don't think that property owners should be able to receive kickbacks from towing agencies based on the number of cars towed.  A property owner should not have a vested interest in having as many cars towed as possible as a revenue source.  Also, it does not set a schedule of rates that are "reasonable and customary" for towing.  There should be limits like how much the maximum is that can be charged to release a "hooked" vehicle etc.  I have wrote to my state rep but never received a response.  Maybe you'll have better luck.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;§§1-15,25,26 -&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;C.56:13-7 to&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;56:13-23&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;§§25,26 – Note to §§16-24&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;§24 – Repealer&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;P.L. 2007, CHAPTER 193, approved October 24, 2007&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Assembly, No. 4053 (Second Reprint)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;An Act concerning towing and towing operators and supplementing P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.) and amending various parts of statutory law.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Be It Enacted by the Senate and General Assembly of the State of New Jersey:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. (New section) This 2[law] act2 shall be known and may be cited as the “Predatory Towing Prevention Act .”&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2. (New section) The Legislature finds and declares that:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. While the majority of tow truck operators in New Jersey are reputable service providers, some unscrupulous towers are engaged in predatory practices victimizing consumers whose vehicles are parked on public streets and private property;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. Predatory towing practices include charging unwarranted or excessive fees, particularly in connection with towing vehicles from private parking lots which do not display any warnings to the vehicle owners, or overcharging consumers for towing services provided under circumstances where the consumer 2[either]2 has no meaningful opportunity to withhold consent;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. The legitimate business interests of tow truck operators and the needs of private property owners for relief from unauthorized parking must be balanced with the interest in providing appropriate protection to consumers;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. Whatever authority exists in the law to regulate towing and towing companies is fragmented among various State agencies and local governments, so that inconsistent or inadequate regulation often results, with insufficient recourse provided under the law; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;e. Therefore, it is in the public interest to create a coordinated, comprehensive framework to establish and enforce minimum standards for tow truck operators.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3. (New section) As used in this act:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1“Basic towing service” means towing as defined in this section and other ancillary services as may be specified by the director by regulation.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Consumer” means a natural person.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Contract rate” means fees for towing services established under a contract between a towing company and a State agency or political subdivision 1, including, but not limited to, independent authorities and instrumentalities thereof1.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1“Decoupling fee” means a charge by a towing company for releasing a motor vehicle to its owner or operator when the vehicle has been, or is about to be, hooked or lifted by a tower, but prior to the vehicle actually having been moved or removed from the property.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Division” means the Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Director” means the Director of the Division of Consumer Affairs.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Motor vehicle” includes all vehicles propelled otherwise than by muscular power, excepting such vehicles as run only upon rails or tracks and motorized bicycles, motorized scooters, motorized wheelchairs and motorized skateboards.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1“Non-consensual towing” means the towing of a motor vehicle from private or public property without the consent of the owner or operator of the vehicle.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Person” means an individual, a sole proprietorship, partnership, corporation, limited liability company or any other business entity.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Person with a substantial interest” means a director, officer or partner of, or any other person having an economic interest of 10 percent or more in, an applicant for, or holder of, a registration as a towing company, or any parent or subsidiary thereof.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Towing” means the moving or removing from public or private property 1or from a storage facility1 by a motor vehicle of 1[another] a consumer’s1 motor vehicle that is damaged as a result of an accident or otherwise disabled, recovered after being stolen, or is parked illegally or otherwise without authorization, or the immobilization of or preparation for moving or removing of such motor vehicle, for which a service charge is made, either directly or indirectly 1[, including any dues] . Dues1 or other charges of clubs or associations which provide towing services 1to club or association members shall not be considered a service charge for purposes of this definition1 .&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Towing company” means a person offering or performing towing services.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Vehicle” means any device in, upon or by which a person or property is or may be transported upon a highway.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;4. (New section)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. No person shall offer to perform, or engage, or attempt to engage in the business of towing unless registered with the division.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. An application for registration shall be made annually, or at such other interval as the director may determine, in writing to the director in the form prescribed by the director and shall be accompanied by a fee, set by the director in a reasonable amount sufficient to defray the division’s expenses incurred in administering and enforcing P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. The applicant shall state the complete street address of the location or locations from which the business of towing shall be conducted, indicating which is the principal location.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. The applicant shall state the complete street address of the location of each of its storage facilities and whether each is secured or unsecured.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;e. The applicant shall enumerate the types of towing services that the applicant intends to provide and a description of the vehicles, including vehicle registration number, weight, number of wheels and purpose, with which the applicant intends to provide the services.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;f. The application shall include a valid original certificate of insurance from an insurer authorized to do business in the State and a schedule of insured motor vehicles that are to be utilized by the applicant, including the amounts of the garage keeper’s legal liability coverage and any “on hook” coverage as an endorsement or contained in a separate schedule, and liability insurance coverage which meets or exceeds the requirements set forth in section 6 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;g. The applicant shall include a tariff listing the services that the applicant provides and the fee charged for each service, which meets the requirements of section 8 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;h. The applicant shall disclose whether the applicant or a person with a substantial interest in the applicant, or any towing company in which such person was a person with a substantial interest and serving in that capacity at the time the conduct or conviction required to be disclosed pursuant to this subsection occurred, has engaged in any of the conduct, or was convicted of a crime, specified in subsection a. of section 5 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;i. The applicant shall furnish any additional information as may be required by the director.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;j. If any of the information required to be included in the application changes, or if additional information should be added after the filing of the application, the applicant shall provide that information to the director, in writing, within 30 calendar days of the change or addition.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;k. Upon issuance of the registration, the division shall provide the registrant with decals and accompanying notices to be affixed to each motor vehicle identified in the application as owned or leased by the registrant to be used to perform towing services.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;5. (New section)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. The director may refuse to issue or may suspend or revoke, any registration issued by him upon proof that the applicant or holder of the registration or, if the applicant is an entity, a person with a substantial interest in the applicant or holder of a registration, or any towing company in which such person was a person with a substantial interest and was serving in such capacity at the time the conduct or conviction required to be disclosed pursuant to this subsection occurred:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) has obtained a registration through fraud, deception or misrepresentation;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) has engaged in the use or employment of dishonesty, fraud, deception, misrepresentation, false promise or false pretense;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(3) has engaged in gross negligence or gross incompetence;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(4) has engaged in repeated acts of negligence or incompetence;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(5) has engaged in professional or occupational misconduct as may be determined by the director;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(6) has had his authority to engage in the activity regulated by the director revoked or suspended by any other state, agency or authority for reasons consistent with this section;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(7) has violated or failed to comply on more than three occasions with the provisions of section 8 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill) or violated or failed to comply with the provisions of any other act or regulation administered by the director; or&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(8) has been convicted of:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(a) a crime under Chapter 11, 12, 13 14 or 15 under Title 2C of the New Jersey Statutes;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(b) motor vehicle theft or any crime involving a motor vehicle under Chapter 20 of Title 2C of the New Jersey Statutes; or&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(c) any other crime under Title 2C of the New Jersey Statutes relating adversely to the performance of towing services or the storage of motor vehicles as determined by the director by regulation.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. A final refusal to register, or the suspension or revocation of a registration shall not be made except upon reasonable notice to the applicant or registrant, and an opportunity for the applicant or registrant to be heard.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;6. (New section) a. A towing company shall maintain liability insurance which meets or exceeds the requirements of this section, 1or such other amounts as the director may determine by regulation,1 including in the case of each light-medium duty tow truck, motor vehicle liability insurance coverage for the death of, or injury to, persons and damage to property for each accident or occurrence in the amount of at least $750,000 single limit, and in the case of each heavy-duty tow truck, motor vehicle liability insurance coverage for the death of or injury to persons and damage to property for each accident or occurrence in the amount of at least $1,000,000 single limit.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. The director shall be named as an additional insured under each insurance policy required under subsection a. of this section and each policy shall provide that the issuer give the director at least 10 days written notice of its intention to cancel or not renew the policy.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1c. Nothing in this section shall preclude a State agency or political subdivision, or the independent authorities or instrumentalities thereof, from requiring additional or higher liability insurance coverages or amounts with respect to contracts for towing and storage services awarded under the authority of such agency, subdivision, authority or instrumentality.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;7. (New section) a. No person shall tow any motor vehicle parked for an unauthorized purpose from any privately owned parking lot, from other private property or from any common driveway without the consent of the motor vehicle owner or operator, unless the person is registered with the division 1pursuant to section 4 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill)1 and 1[the parking lot or private property has] there is1 posted in a conspicuous place at all 1vehicular1 entrances to the property which can be easily be seen by the public, a sign no smaller than 36 inches high and 36 inches wide stating:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) the purpose or purposes for which parking is authorized and the times during which such parking is permitted;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) that unauthorized parking is prohibited and unauthorized motor vehicles will be towed at the owner’s expense;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(3) the name, address, and telephone number of the towing company that will perform the towing;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(4) the charges, which shall not exceed the fee specified in the tariff on file with the director, for the towing and storage of towed motor vehicles; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(5) the street address of the storage facility where the towed vehicles can be redeemed after payment of the posted charges and the times during which the vehicle may be redeemed.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. A towing company shall not remove a motor vehicle from private property 1without the consent of the owner or operator of the vehicle,1 without first obtaining the written authorization from the property owner or lessee, or its employee or agent, who shall be present at the time of removal and verify the alleged violation 1if it occurs during normal business hours of any premises at the location operated by the property owner or lessee authorizing the removal of the vehicle1 , except that general authorization in writing shall be sufficient for the removal of a motor vehicle parked on private property within 15 feet of a fire hydrant, standpipe or other water source for fighting fires; in a fire lane; 1[or]1 in a manner that interferes with the entrance to or exit from the property 1; or if the violation occurs at a time other than during normal business hours of the premises of the property owner or lessee authorizing the removal of the vehicle1 .&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. Except as provided in subsection d. of this section, the owner or person in lawful possession of private property may cause the removal of the motor vehicle parked on the property to a storage facility within a reasonable distance of the property if signs are posted on the property as required under section a. of this section and the towing company complies with the requirements of this act.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. The provisions of subsection a. shall not apply to a motor vehicle parked on a lot or parcel on which is situated a single-family unit or an owner occupied multi-unit structure of not more than six units or in front of any driveway where the motor vehicle is blocking access to that driveway.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;8. (New section) a. The director by regulation shall establish a schedule of towing and storage services for which a towing company may charge a service fee 1, and shall specify services that are ancillary to and included as part of basic towing services for which no fees in addition to the basic towing service fee may be charged1 .&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. All towing companies shall file with the division a tariff which lists the services the towing company provides and the fee that the towing company charges for each service, which fees shall be reasonable and not excessive.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) A towing company shall file its tariffs at least annually, in the manner prescribed by the director, and may amend the services it provides or the fees it charges for services provided by filing an amended tariff with the division, provided however that a towing company may not charge amended fees set forth in an amended tariff until the division provides confirmation of receipt of the amended tariff. A towing company may not modify its tariff more than once during any three month period, except to add or delete a service, reduce a fee or conform to the requirements of this section.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) A towing company’s fee for a towing service shall be presumed unreasonable and excessive if the fee exceeds 150%, or a different percentage established by the director by regulation, of the average fee for such service charged in the county of the towing company’s principal location, which figure shall be calculated based upon the fees charged for such service as reported in the tariffs filed by all towing companies with principal locations in the same county and shall be published on an Internet website in accordance with this subsection c. of this section.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(3) The presumption set forth in paragraph (2) of this subsection shall not apply until the first day of the third month after the Internet website authorized by subsection c. of this section becomes operative.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. The division shall collect and maintain the tariffs filed pursuant to subsection a. of this section in an electronic system, and the director shall cause the tariff data to be organized and made available to the public on an Internet website in a format that enables consumers to review the fees for towing services charged by each registered towing company in the State. The electronic system shall calculate annually and make available on the website the average cost, broken down by towing service and county, of the 1[fee charged of] fees for1 each towing service 1[fee]1 charged by the towing companies operating in each county in the State.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1d. Nothing in this section shall be deemed to limit the authority of a State agency or political subdivision, or the independent authorities or instrumentalities thereof, to establish contract rates for towing and storage services in accordance with a contract awarded under the authority of such agency, subdivision, authority, or instrumentality.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;9. (New section)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. No person shall tow a motor vehicle pursuant to section 7 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill) to a storage facility or store such vehicle at a storage facility unless the storage facility:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) has a business office open to the public between 8 a.m. and 6 p.m. at least five (5) days a week, excluding holidays; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) is secured and, if it is an outdoor storage facility, lighted from dusk to dawn.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. A towing company shall provide reasonable accommodations for after-hours release of stored motor vehicles and shall not charge a release fee or other charge for releasing motor vehicles to their owners after normal business hours or on weekends.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;10. (New section) It shall be an unlawful practice for any towing company:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. To fail to affix on a motor vehicle used to provide towing services the proper decal issued by the division and a notice stating:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“This tow truck is registered with the New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs. The driver is required to provide you with a written schedule of the fees charged for towing and storage services before providing that service to you, including those services for which there is no fee. If the fee charged is in excess of the fee listed on the schedule, please notify the Division of Consumer Affairs at ###-###-####.”&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. (1) Except as otherwise provided in paragraph (2) of this subsection, to fail to provide the person whose motor vehicle is to be towed, prior to providing any towing services, a written schedule of fees, the information contained in the notice required under subsection a. above, the following legend, and such other information as determined by the director:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“The fees set forth in the schedule may not exceed the tariff filed with the Division of Consumer Affairs. You may review the tariff on the Division’s website at XXXXX@dca.lps.state.nj.us. The filing of a tariff with the Division of Consumer Affairs does not imply endorsement of the fees and charges set forth in the tariff.”&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) To fail to provide the schedule and information required under paragraph (1) of this subsection immediately upon being contacted by the person whose motor vehicle was towed, if that person was not present at the time the towing services were provided.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. To make, give, or cause any undue or unreasonable preference or advantage, or undue or unreasonable prejudice or disadvantage, to any person in any particular locality, with respect to providing towing services. 1The provision of towing services by a club or association to its members in exchange for the payment of dues or similar membership charges, which club or association membership is generally available to the public, shall not be deemed an undue or unreasonable preference or advantage within the meaning of this section.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. To give any benefit or advantage, including a pecuniary benefit, to any person for providing information about motor vehicles parked for unauthorized purposes on privately owned property or otherwise in connection with towing from privately owned property motor vehicles parked without authorization.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;e. 1To fail, when so requested by the owner or operator of a vehicle subject to non-consensual towing, to release a vehicle to the owner or operator that has been, or is about to be, hooked or lifted but has not actually been moved or removed from the property when the vehicle owner or operator returns to the vehicle, or to charge the owner or operator requesting release of the vehicle more than the decoupling fee specified in the tariff.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;f.1 To charge any fee 1[in excess of the lesser of] other than1 any applicable contract rate or 1[that] , in the absence of an applicable contract rate, the 2lesser of the rate set forth in an applicable schedule of fees or other charges established by municipal ordinance adopted pursuant to section 1 of P.L. 1979, c.101 (C. 40:48-2.49) or the2 rate1 specified in 2[its] the towing company’s2 tariff on file with the director, or to charge a fee 1in an amount or for a service1 not listed on the tariff on file with the director at the time 1except as may be permitted by the director by regulation1. 2Nothing in this section shall preclude a towing company, acting on behalf of a club or association, from charging members of the club or association a fee at a rate established by contract between the towing company and the club or association which is lower than the rate specified in the towing company’s tariff on file with the director, provided that membership in such club or association is generally available to the public and that such rates are filed with the director pursuant to section 8 of this act.2&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1[f] g1 . To refuse to accept for payment in lieu of cash or an insurance company check for towing or storage services a debit card, charge card or credit card if the operator ordinarily accepts such card at his place of business, unless such refusal is authorized in accordance with section 4 of P.L.2002, c.67, (C.56:13-4) as amended by P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;11. (New section)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Every towing company shall retain and make available for inspection by the division for a period of three years, invoices, job orders, logs, claims for reimbursement from insurance companies and other documentation relating to towing services performed and rates charged for the services.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;12. (New section)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;There is created in the Department of the Treasury a special dedicated, non-lapsing fund to be known as the “Towing and Storage Administration and Enforcement Fund.” The fund shall be the depository for fees, cost recoveries and penalties collected under P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill). Monies deposited in the fund and the interest earned thereon shall be used for the administration of this act. The Legislature shall annually appropriate from the fund monies to the division for the administration of this act.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;13. (New section) 2[Rules and regulations; contracting authority.]2&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. The director, pursuant to the provisions of the “Administrative Procedure Act,” P.L.1968, c.410 (C.52:14B-1 et seq.), may promulgate rules and regulations to effectuate the purposes of this act.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. The division may contract with a public or private entity for the purpose of developing, administering and maintaining the registration process and the electronic data base for tariffs provided for in section 8 of P.L , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;14. (New section) a. The provisions of this act shall preempt any political subdivision from 2[regulating,]2 requiring or issuing any registration or license of any towing company 2in addition to that which is required by section 4 of this act2.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1[b.]1 This section shall not limit the existing authority of a political subdivision to:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) license and collect a general and nondiscriminatory tax upon all businesses; or&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) impose any additional requirements or conditions as part of any contract to perform towing and recovery services for that jurisdiction.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1b. The provisions of this act shall not be deemed to limit the authority of the 2[new] New2 Jersey Turnpike Authority or the 2[south] South2 Jersey Transportation Authority to establish rules and regulations governing the provision of towing and storage services on the roadways and properties under each entity’s respective control.1&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;15. (New section) 1[(a)] a.1 It is an unlawful practice and a violation of P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.) to violate any provision of this act.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1[(b)] b.1 In addition to any penalties or other remedies provided in P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.), the director may order a towing company that has billed a consumer or insurer an amount in excess of the fee specified in its filed tariff for the service provided to reimburse the consumer or insurer for the excess cost with interest.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;16. Section 2 of P.L. 2002, c. 77 (C.27:23-6.2) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2. a. An operator awarded a contract for towing and storage services by the New Jersey Turnpike Authority shall register with the authority. 1[The authority shall register any towing company] In order to be eligible to bid for the award of such a contract, an operator shall have1 registered with the Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety 1pursuant to section 4 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill)1 . Upon issuance of the registration, the authority shall provide the operator with two decals and accompanying notices for each tow truck owned or leased by that operator and to be used under the terms of the contract. The decals and the accompanying notices, which shall be of a distinctive design and color, shall be conspicuously displayed on the exterior of each such tow truck in a manner and location prescribed by the authority.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The decals shall set forth a specific registration number for each registered tow truck. The notices shall include a statement indicating substantially the following: “This tow truck is registered with the New Jersey Highway Authority. The driver is required to provide you with a written schedule of the fees charged for towing and storage services before providing that service to you, including those services for which there is no fee. If the fee charged is in excess of the fee listed on the schedule, please notify the authority or the New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs.” An operator shall file a copy of the schedule of fees with the authority. Upon request of the Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety, the authority shall provide a list of the registered tow trucks to the division, in addition to a copy of the schedule of fees.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. Prior to providing any towing services, a driver of a tow truck shall provide the person whose vehicle is to be towed a written schedule of fees and shall recite the information contained in the notice.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. An operator who fails to display the decals and notices required by subsection a. of this section or the driver of a tow truck who fails to provide a person to be towed the written schedule of fees or recite the information contained in the notice prior to providing a towing service as required by subsection b. of this section shall be subject to a fine of $300 for the first offense. For the second and any subsequent offense the operator or the driver, as the case may be, shall be subject to a fine of $600.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. It shall be an unlawful practice and a violation of P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.) for any person to charge a fee in excess of the fee listed in the written schedule of fees provided pursuant to subsection a. of this section.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;e. If an operator or the driver of an operator’s tow truck is convicted a third time for violation of any provisions of this section, the authority may, in its discretion, terminate the operator’s contract for towing and storage services with the authority.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf: P.L.2002, c.77, s.2)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;17. Section 3 of P.L. 2002, c. 77 (C.27:25A-8.1) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3. a. An operator awarded a contract for towing and storage services by the South Jersey Transportation Authority shall register with the authority. 1[The authority shall register any towing company] In order to be eligible to bid for the award of such a contract, an operator shall have1 registered with the Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety 1pursuant to section 4 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill)1 . Upon issuance of the registration, the authority shall provide the operator with two decals and accompanying notices for each tow truck owned or leased by that operator and to be used under the terms of the contract. The decals and the accompanying notices, which shall be of a distinctive design and color, shall be conspicuously displayed on the exterior of each such tow truck in a manner and location prescribed by the authority.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The decals shall set forth a specific registration number for each registered tow truck. The notices shall include a statement indicating substantially the following: “This tow truck is registered with the New Jersey Highway Authority. The driver is required to provide you with a written schedule of the fees charged for towing and storage services before providing that service to you, including those services for which there is no fee. If the fee charged is in excess of the fee listed on the schedule, please notify the authority or the New Jersey Division of Consumer Affairs.” An operator shall file a copy of the schedule of fees with the authority. Upon request of the Division of Consumer Affairs in the Department of Law and Public Safety, the authority shall provide a list of the registered tow trucks to the division, in addition to a copy of the schedule of fees.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. Prior to providing any towing services, a driver of a tow truck shall provide the person whose vehicle is to be towed a written schedule of fees and shall recite the information contained in the notice.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. An operator who fails to display the decals and notices required by subsection a. of this section or the driver of a tow truck who fails to provide a person to be towed the written schedule of fees or recite the information contained in the notice prior to providing a towing service as required by subsection b. of this section shall be subject to a fine of $300 for the first offense. For the second and any subsequent offense the operator or the driver, as the case may be, shall be subject to a fine of $600.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. It shall be an unlawful practice and a violation of P.L.1960, c.39 (C.56:8-1 et seq.) for any person to charge a fee in excess of the fee listed in the written schedule of fees provided pursuant to subsection a. of this section.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;e. If an operator or the driver of an operator’s tow truck is found to have convicted a third time for violation of any provisions of this section, the authority may, in its discretion, terminate the operator’s contract for towing and storage services with the authority.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf: P.L.2002, c.77, s.3)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;18. Section 3 of P.L.1999, c. 396 (C.39:3-84.8) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3. a. An application for tow truck registration shall contain the following information:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(1) The name and address of the towing company’s principal owner or owners;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(2) The address of the principal business office of the towing company;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(3) The location of any garage, parking lot, or other storage area, where motor vehicles or other objects moved by the towing company may be stored or placed;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(4) A valid certificate of insurance and a schedule of insured vehicles that are to be utilized by the towing company from an insurer authorized to do business in the state, including the amounts of the garage keeper’s legal liability coverage and any “on hook” coverage as an endorsement or contained in a separate schedule, and liability insurance coverage, including in the case of each light-medium duty tow truck, motor vehicle liability insurance coverage for the death of, or injury to. persons and damage to property for each accident or occurrence in the amount of at least $750,000 single limit, and in the case of each heavy-duty tow truck, motor vehicle liability insurance coverage for the death of, or injury to, persons and damage to property for each accident or occurrence in the amount of at least $1,000,000 single limit; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(5) Documentation of the manufacturer’s gross vehicle weight rating for each tow truck.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;[If a system for the licensure of towing companies has been established pursuant to section 4 of P.L.1999, c.396 (C.39:3-84.9), the] The towing company shall include in the application a copy of the [license] registration issued to it pursuant to [that section] section 2 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Except as otherwise provided in this act, the registration for these vehicles shall be issued and renewed pursuant to the provisions of this Title.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf. P.L.1999, c.396, s.3)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;19. Section 1 of P.L.2002, c.67 (C.56:13-1) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. As used in this act:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Charge card” means a credit card on an account for which no periodic rate is used to compute a finance charge.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Credit card” means any card, plate, coupon book, or other single credit device that may be used from time to time to obtain credit.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Operator” means a person who engages in the business of transporting [inoperable] motor vehicles that are inoperable or parked illegally or otherwise without authorization from public or private property to a site where repairs may be made or the vehicle may be stored and who may also perform motor vehicle repairs.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf. P.L.2002, c.67, s.1)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;20. Section 3 of P.L. 2002, c. 67 (C.56:13-3) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3. If the operator cannot repair the inoperable vehicle to the satisfaction of the motorist he shall, with the motorist’s consent, subject to the provisions of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill), transport the vehicle to the operator’s place of business or to another mutually agreed upon location. The vehicle, once repaired, may be retained in the possession of the operator or other repairer, as the case may be, pending payment, pursuant to N.J.S.2A:44-20 et seq. The operator, if other than the repairer, shall be eligible for reimbursement for transporting the vehicle to the repair site. If the estimated cost of repairs exceeds $50, the motorist shall be given a written estimate of the repair costs.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf. P.L.2002, c.67, s.3)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;21. Section 4 of P.L. 2002, c. 67 (C.56:13-4) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;For services rendered, or to redeem a motor vehicle from storage, the operator shall accept in payment either cash, a check issued by an insurance company, a valid debit card, or a valid major credit card or charge card subject to the provisions of subsection b. of this section.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. [If after examining the card, the operator is unable to determine to his satisfaction the credit worthiness or financial responsibility of the motorist, the] The operator may request additional identification, as determined by the Director of the Division of Consumer Affairs, before proceeding with repairs or towing. Unless the motorist is unable to produce such identification, or the operator has a bona fide reason to believe the card or other identification is fictitious, altered, stolen, expired or revoked or not valid for any other cause or is clearly offered with intent to defraud the issuer, the debit card, charge card or credit card shall be deemed an acceptable form of payment in lieu of cash if the operator ordinarily accepts the card at his place of business. Nothing in this act shall preclude payment by a motorist in the form of check or money order, if this form of payment is acceptable to the operator.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf. P.L.2002, c.67, s.4)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;222. Section 1 of P.L.1973, c.137 (C.39:4-56.6) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. No person shall park or leave unattended a vehicle on private property without the consent of the owner or other person in control or possession of the property or for a period in excess of that for which consent was given, except in the case of emergency or disablement of the vehicle in which case the owner or operator thereof shall arrange for the expeditious removal of the vehicle. This section shall not apply to manufactured or mobile homes left unattended and for which there exists or existed a rental agreement to occupy a space on the property.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;[The] Subject to the requirements of section 7 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill), the owner or other person in control or possession of the property on which a vehicle is parked or left unattended in violation of this section may remove or hire another person to remove and store the vehicle. It shall be the obligation of the owner of the vehicle to pay the reasonable costs for the removal and for any storage which may result from such removal before he shall be entitled to recover the possession of the vehicle. If the owner of the vehicle refuses to pay such costs or fails to make any claim for the return of the vehicle within 90 days after such removal, the vehicle may be sold at public auction in accordance with the provisions of N.J.S.2A:44-20 through N.J.S.2A:44-31.2&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf. P.L. 1999, c.340, s.10.)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;223. Section 1 of P.L.1979, c.101 (C.40:48-2.49) is amended to read as follows:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. Notwithstanding the provisions of section 1 of P.L.1973, c.137 (C.39:4-56.6) or any other law, a municipality may regulate, by ordinance, the removal of motor vehicles from private or public property by operators engaged in such practice, including, but not limited to, the fees charged for storage following removal in accordance with section 3 of P.L.1987, c.127 (C.40:48-2.50), fees charged for such removal, notice requirements therefore, and the mercantile licensing of such operators.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The ordinance shall set forth non-discriminatory and non-exclusionary regulations governing operators engaged in the business of removing and storing motor vehicles. The regulations shall include, but not be limited to:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;a. A schedule of fees or other charges which an operator may charge vehicle owners for towing services, storage services or both;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;b. Minimum standards of operator performance, including but not limited to standards concerning the adequacy of equipment and facilities, availability and response time, and the security of vehicles towed or stored;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;c. The designation of a municipal officer or agency to enforce the provisions of the ordinance in accordance with due process of law;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;d. The requirement that such regulations and fee schedules of individual towers shall be made available to the public during normal business hours of the municipality.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Nothing in this section shall be construed to authorize a municipality to establish charges for services that are not included in the schedule of towing and storage services for which a towing company may charge a service fee established by the Director of Consumer Affairs pursuant to section 8 of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill). Nothing in this section shall be construed to exempt an operator from complying with the requirements of P.L. , c. (C. ) (pending before the Legislature as this bill).2&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(cf: P.L.1997, c.387. s.1)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2[22.] 24.2 The following sections are repealed:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Section 4 of P.L.1999, c.396 (C. 39:3-84.9);&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Section 2[1 of P.L. 1973, c. 137 (C.39:4-56.6);&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Section 1 of P.L. 1979, c.101 (C.40:48-2.49);&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Sections 3 and]2 4 of P.L. 1997, c. 387 2[(C.40:48-2.54 and 2.55)] (C.40:48-2.55)2; and&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Section 5 of P.L. 1997, c.387 (C.56:8-2.26)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2[23.] 25.2 If any section, subsection, clause or provision of this act shall be adjudged unconstitutional or to be ineffective in whole or in part, to the extent that it is not adjudged unconstitutional or is not ineffective it shall be valid and effective and no other section, subsection clause or provision of this act shall on account thereof be deemed invalid or ineffective, and the applicability or invalidity of any section, subsection, clause or provision of this act in any one or more instances or under any one or more circumstances shall not be taken to affect or prejudice in any way its applicability or validity in any other instance or under any other circumstances.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2[24.] 26.2 This act shall take effect on the 360th day following enactment, except that section 4 shall remain inoperative for 180 days following 2[enactment] the effective date2, but the director may take such anticipatory action as may be necessary to effectuate that provision of this act.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Regulates certain tows and requires licensure of towing companies.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-1782900506708160681?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/1782900506708160681/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=1782900506708160681' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1782900506708160681'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1782900506708160681'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2009/10/towing-in-new-jersey.html' title='Towing in New Jersey'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-8134489448434021211</id><published>2008-11-26T09:43:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2008-12-01T06:05:36.379-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Happy Thanksgiving!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SS2Mt339vWI/AAAAAAAAAEg/qFpy-P7IQqw/s1600-h/art_turkeypardon_gi.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 292px; height: 219px;" src="http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SS2Mt339vWI/AAAAAAAAAEg/qFpy-P7IQqw/s400/art_turkeypardon_gi.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5273025458441403746" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Just one more thing &lt;a href="http://politicalticker.blogs.cnn.com/2008/11/26/president-bush-readies-more-pardons/"&gt;our current president doesn't know&lt;/a&gt;!  He can't pardon a turkey!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Have a GREAT Thanksgiving!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;object width="425" height="344"&gt;&lt;param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/fcCgmjqDA7k&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/fcCgmjqDA7k&amp;hl=en&amp;fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="425" height="344"&gt;&lt;/embed&gt;&lt;/object&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-8134489448434021211?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/8134489448434021211/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=8134489448434021211' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/8134489448434021211'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/8134489448434021211'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2008/11/happy-thanksgiving.html' title='Happy Thanksgiving!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SS2Mt339vWI/AAAAAAAAAEg/qFpy-P7IQqw/s72-c/art_turkeypardon_gi.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-3022101822681690320</id><published>2008-10-23T23:00:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2008-10-24T07:43:36.877-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Something that amused me</title><content type='html'>I was surfing the internet recently when I came across an article on &lt;a href="http://www.cnn.com/"&gt;CNN.com &lt;/a&gt;about the &lt;a href="http://money.cnn.com/galleries/2008/moneymag/0807/gallery.bplive_mostsingles.moneymag/index.html"&gt;top 25 places to be single &lt;/a&gt;in the U.S.  I am now happily married to The Girl Who Tolerates A.S.S. and have no interest in this anymore, but it caught my eye.  Hoboken is apparently the # 1 place in the U.S. to be single.  This is not what amused me. However, they should probably put some kind of a qualifier in the article that says it is only the number one place for singles if they either 1)Don't own a car or 2)find spending 3 + hours looking for parking relaxing and or a sexual turn on.  What amused me was that apparently out of all the places they could have chosen to focus on, somehow &lt;a href="http://money.cnn.com/galleries/2008/moneymag/0807/gallery.bplive_mostsingles.moneymag/21.html"&gt;East Orange &lt;/a&gt;and &lt;a href="http://money.cnn.com/magazines/moneymag/bplive/2008/snapshots/PL3451000.html"&gt;Newark &lt;/a&gt;(yes in NJ!) made the cut.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;For the moment let's focus on Newark.  Apparently "Both work and love can flourish..." &lt;a href="http://query.nytimes.com/gst/fullpage.html?res=9E0CE1DD1631F934A1575BC0A964958260"&gt;in the city known in 1992 as the car theft capitol of the country.&lt;/a&gt;  Also, it seems as though the murder rate has gone down slightly this year.  Through the first half of 2008 &lt;a href="http://www.nj.com/news/index.ssf/2008/07/newarks_murder_rate_on_track_t.html"&gt;there have only been 30 murders&lt;/a&gt;!!!!!  Only 30 murders would certainly be a selling point for me if I were single! Another great thing about Newark is how much money you can make. The median family income is $39,000!!! Can you believe it?  $39,000 for a whole family!  Certainly a single person could be expected to make $25,000? Lot's of disposable income to go out on dates! &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Now let's talk about East Orange.  The home town of notable stars like &lt;a href="http://www.concreteloop.com/images/whit.gif"&gt;Whitney Houston&lt;/a&gt;, &lt;a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Garrard"&gt;David Garrard&lt;/a&gt;, and &lt;a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Althea_Gibson"&gt;Althea Gibson&lt;/a&gt; is the "Crossroads of New Jersey," and "it's a great place for singles to cross paths."  What they dont tell you is that East Orange, like newark has a bit of a &lt;a href="http://www.cityrating.com/citycrime.asp?city=East+Orange&amp;state=NJ"&gt;crime problem&lt;/a&gt;. Also, according to the last census about 15.9% of families and 19.2% of the population were below the poverty line.  But wait "with Elmwood and Soverel park activities, local tennis courts and plenty of community and &lt;a href="http://evanced.info/eastorange/evanced/eventcalendar.asp"&gt;local library events&lt;/a&gt;, East Orange has plenty of ways to meet up" for free. Hey this is great!  The Yu-Gi-Oh tournament, and Halloween Spectacular Magic show at the EO Library sound like just the right events to meet that special someone.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The bottom line is that if you are poor and looking for love there are plenty of better places in the U.S. to be single. The Girl Who Tolerates A.S.S. and I recently went to Hawaii on our Honeymoon.  There is a lot of poverty in Hawaii and if you average out all of the factors like median income, and cost of living, you will probably find that residents of most of the Hawaiian islands have similar disposable income to residents of Newark and East Orange.  There is however, one BIG difference.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SQHdf5trxVI/AAAAAAAAADg/9THT1fYxmlQ/s1600-h/Hawaii.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 400px; height: 300px;" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SQHdf5trxVI/AAAAAAAAADg/9THT1fYxmlQ/s400/Hawaii.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5260729379883566418" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-3022101822681690320?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/3022101822681690320/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=3022101822681690320' title='3 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/3022101822681690320'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/3022101822681690320'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2008/10/something-that-amused-me.html' title='Something that amused me'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SQHdf5trxVI/AAAAAAAAADg/9THT1fYxmlQ/s72-c/Hawaii.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>3</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-7992898661663546194</id><published>2008-07-31T05:20:00.001-07:00</published><updated>2008-08-20T12:52:57.277-07:00</updated><title type='text'>Oh those tricky Olympians</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SKUtWRxMogI/AAAAAAAAADY/eQxAk72li98/s1600-h/Pat.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SKUtWRxMogI/AAAAAAAAADY/eQxAk72li98/s400/Pat.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5234640002638193154" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;According to &lt;a href="http://www.guardian.co.uk/sport/2008/jul/30/olympicgames2008.gender"&gt;this article &lt;/a&gt;"officials in Beijing have been designing a special laboratory to determine the sex of any athletes taking part in this year's Olympic games. Suspected athletes will be evaluated from their external appearances by experts and undergo blood tests to examine their sex hormones, genes and chromosomes for sex determination..."&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I don't know about you but I have known the differences between a man and woman since playing doctor as a young boy. They may not have this game in China so it is up to A.S.S. to give the Chinese Olympic officials some suggestions as to how to determine the gender of someone.  Here are 10 suggestions that might help out.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;10) Check the persons birth certificate.  They generally note this information when you're born.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;9) Take notice of the amount of hair on the person's &lt;br /&gt;knuckles, hands, and forearms.  Most men will have visible, dark hair on their hands and wrists, and sometimes knuckles. This could also be the case with some middle eastern and mediteranian women so use this tip in conjunction with some of the others.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;8) Observe the person's shoulders and hips. Men’s shoulders tend to be broader than their hips, while women’s hips are typically wider for child bearing.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;7) Look for an Adam’s apple.  I'm still pretty sure only men have them.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;6) See which bathroom they go to at a public place. "Womens" or "Mens". However this is not always acurate so don't let this fool you. Chances are good they will use the image appropriate restroom if they are trying to hide something.  However they may get tripped up on this out of habit.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;5) Be suspicious of baggy clothing. The person may be trying to conceal a bulge but this may be hard to notice in a skirt or dress. You can follow this up with #4.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;4) Use the Crocodile Dundee test.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;3) Put them in a room with 2 TV's.  One should have on Ultimate Fighting and the other should have the Lifetime movie of the week.  See which one they watch.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;2)Get a sample of their handwriting.  Men have chicken-scratch handwriting. Women use scented, colored stationary and they dot their "i's" with circles and hearts. It is totally annoying to read a note from a woman.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;And the # 1 way you can tell the difference between women and men&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Ask a simple question! ...........&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-7992898661663546194?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/7992898661663546194/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=7992898661663546194' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/7992898661663546194'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/7992898661663546194'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2008/07/oh-those-tricky-olympians.html' title='Oh those tricky Olympians'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/SKUtWRxMogI/AAAAAAAAADY/eQxAk72li98/s72-c/Pat.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-6937431250493256247</id><published>2008-01-10T08:52:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2008-11-27T07:10:40.554-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Extra! Extra! A.S.S. Returns!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://bp3.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPAbZCdpI/AAAAAAAAACc/LU8egD2GMMo/s1600-h/dog.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp3.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPAbZCdpI/AAAAAAAAACc/LU8egD2GMMo/s400/dog.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153893692343482002" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-weight:bold;"&gt;Enough with the dog lovers!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I know I’ve been away a long time.  Perhaps I’m not quite as angry as I used to be because it’s been a LONG time since I’ve felt compelled to write about anything.  The Girl Who Tolerates A.S.S. may finally be taming me.  That aside, I read a story this morning that particularly irked me.  Apparently Jake Coyle (sorry I couldn’t find a picture of the shmuck for tomato throwing) from the Associated Press was so distraught by a dog getting turned into a zombie in “I am Legend” that he felt compelled to inform the public by way of a “&lt;a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/22577865/"&gt;letter to Hollywood&lt;/a&gt;”.  Now, I have not seen this particular movie but I have seen plenty where the dog survives impending doom and I find it ridiculous.  In Anchorman a dog jumps off a bridge and magically appears in the last scene. In “Armageddon” a meteor crushes a Samoan giant.  Who survives? The Dog standing next to him! In Independence Day Harry Connick Jr gets blown out of the sky, millions of people die, but a dog manages to run faster than a fireball AND leap out of its way. Give me a break! It's retarded that people value animals more than humans.  Call me an evil bastard but I like it when the dog dies!    I am so sick of the American Public’s obsession with their dogs.  Now don’t get me wrong.  I like a nice lab as much as the next guy but there comes a point where enough is enough.  Perhaps you remember a few months ago people were ready to lynch Michael Vick over the dog fighting incident. People were calling for his lifetime suspension from the NFL. No one here is saying that his actions weren't horrible but IT’S STILL ONLY A DOG.  Ray Lewis of the Baltimore Ravens &lt;a href="http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com/football/nfl/news/19/06/04/lewis_agreement/"&gt;entered plea deal to avoid murder charges&lt;/a&gt;!  This was murder of a person and I did not hear one person talk of “lifetime” suspension.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt; &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;To the makers of Rambo, Vacation, Fear, Turner &amp; Hootch, American Psyco, Toxic Avenger, A Fish Called Wanda, The Fly 2, Haloween, Mars Attacks, and any other movie where Fluffy fetches a grenade …… A.S.S. salutes you for keeping it real!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-weight:bold;"&gt;I’ll park where I want!&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;There is a new trend growing in shopping malls and supermarkets all across the country and it’s pissing me off!  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://bp1.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPJ7ZCdqI/AAAAAAAAACk/Qq-1QAYUoPM/s1600-h/Parking.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp1.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPJ7ZCdqI/AAAAAAAAACk/Qq-1QAYUoPM/s400/Parking.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153893855552239266" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I have something to say to store owners who have these signs in their lots.  I don’t observe your little marketing ploy!  Go Fuck Yourself!  I’ll park where I damn well please!  I don’t see a “32 year old guy who doesn’t feel like fucking walking 2 miles to get a loaf of bread” sign!  Why the hell do parents get a pass on the musical cars game?  If it’s such a freaking burden lugging your children around leave them home!  No one wants to be near your little germ infested disease carriers anyway.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-weight:bold;"&gt;A James Blunt follow up.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPWrZCdrI/AAAAAAAAACs/vybATjMAMcg/s1600-h/Blunt.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPWrZCdrI/AAAAAAAAACs/vybATjMAMcg/s400/Blunt.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5153894074595571378" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If you remember, last year I wrote a a &lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/2006/06/guest-blog-4.html"&gt;guest post&lt;/a&gt; on &lt;a href="http://pppannoy.blogspot.com/"&gt;my best friend's blog&lt;/a&gt; about why James Blunt Sucks.  I took a little flack about this from The Girl Who Tolerates A.S.S. because she happens to be a Blunt fan.  The other day we were in a store and there was some music on in the background that she caught me slightly bopping my head to.  She said “You like this?”  I said “It’s ok.” She said “Do you know who this is?” I said “Carly Simon?” She said “No! James Blunt!”  In my previous post, part of my argument was that he sounds like a woman.  I rest my case!&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-6937431250493256247?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/6937431250493256247/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=6937431250493256247' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/6937431250493256247'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/6937431250493256247'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2008/01/extra-extra-ass-returns.html' title='Extra! Extra! A.S.S. Returns!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp3.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/R4ZPAbZCdpI/AAAAAAAAACc/LU8egD2GMMo/s72-c/dog.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-2507312927844949966</id><published>2007-03-15T19:10:00.000-07:00</published><updated>2007-03-16T05:26:29.712-07:00</updated><title type='text'>I'll Vote For That!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/Rfn9OqVPwgI/AAAAAAAAAB4/pwgKpMSZ_7M/s1600-h/vote.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/Rfn9OqVPwgI/AAAAAAAAAB4/pwgKpMSZ_7M/s400/vote.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5042339686141379074" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If you know me you know that I can get quite passionate about politics.  Specifically it bothers the hell out of me that people spend so much of their time complaining about the government and how "this country is just not the same as it used to be" or about "how my taxes are too high" or ..... (Insert complaint here), yet when it comes to voting they can't find the 10 minutes it takes to be part of the solution.  Of course my complaining about them not voting does not really do anything to get them to start.  I do however &lt;a href="http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/search?q=go+vote"&gt;try to encourage people &lt;/a&gt;I am friends with and work with to &lt;a href="http://www.rockthevote.com/"&gt;register to vote.&lt;/a&gt; This being said I don't really think that my preaching has ever done much to influence anyone one way or another.  The same cannot be said however for &lt;a href="http://www.votejoeredner.com/"&gt;Joe Redner.&lt;/a&gt;  Joe Redner is running for the Tampa city council.  Mr. Redner also happens to own a nude strip club.  He has been so upset with voter turnout that he has offered anyone who &lt;a href="http://www.baynews9.com/content/36/2007/3/15/231235.html?title=Redner+hopes+to+entice+voters"&gt;votes in the election free admission &lt;/a&gt;to his club.  I think this is brilliant!  This is the solution that America has been looking for.  I'll tell you this: If you tell an average American red blooded man that all he has to do to watch a naked girl shake her ass for free is to pull a lever he'll be fighting to get back into line.  Perhaps this is the solution to the voting machine problems in Florida as well.  They can have strippers in the booths to explain to these people how to press a button.  They're slogan can be "Voting is so easy even a coked up stripper can do it!" Perhaps they can even place electrodes on the strippers naked breasts.  Then voters could squeeze left for Democrat or right for Republican.  Maybe just maybe this will start a whole new trend.  Here are a few more ideas that might help with voter turnout:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;1. Free tickets to the Friday night tractor pull&lt;br /&gt;2. Vote for beer night&lt;br /&gt;3. Vote for a Democrat and get to punch a Republican night&lt;br /&gt;4. Come vote and meet a WWE superstar day&lt;br /&gt;5. Come vote or your TV is confiscated for the Indy and Datona 500&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Of course these are just a few ideas I though of after a 3 hour plane ride to Florida.  I'd love to hear any ideas you might have as well.  Together we may just come up with a solution.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-2507312927844949966?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/2507312927844949966/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=2507312927844949966' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/2507312927844949966'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/2507312927844949966'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2007/03/ill-vote-for-that.html' title='I&apos;ll Vote For That!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/Rfn9OqVPwgI/AAAAAAAAAB4/pwgKpMSZ_7M/s72-c/vote.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-4046720497973991520</id><published>2007-02-06T05:47:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2007-02-06T06:11:12.262-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Out Of This World</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://bp1.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RciJ528AqeI/AAAAAAAAABc/5ukt07LDqrQ/s1600-h/Spacewalk.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp1.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RciJ528AqeI/AAAAAAAAABc/5ukt07LDqrQ/s400/Spacewalk.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5028420611051923938" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;In a little off planet news &lt;a href="http://www.cnn.com/2007/TECH/space/02/04/spacewalk.ap/index.html"&gt;" U.S. astronaut Sunita Williams has now spent more time in space than any other woman, setting the record on Sunday as she and a crew mate upgraded the international space station's cooling system."  &lt;/a&gt;  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I think this is great.  I am not one of those people who believe the space program is a waste of money.  Human beings are explorers.  Our very nature drives us to climb the next mountain, turn over the next rock, or even go to the next star. We need dreams.  If those dreams turn us to the heavens in search of something that is actually tangible then all the better.  We are still in the infancy of space exploration and I am only sorry I won't be around once things really get cookin.  I think it would be cool to learn about life on other worlds. As long as they don't want to turn us into green mush with their ray guns I would be a big fan of meeting them.  Our astronauts are so lucky to have this opportunity.  As soon as space tourism gets under $100,000 a flight I'll be right there with them :o) &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Then again there is a good possibility I could wind up with &lt;a href="http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/02/05/space.love/index.html"&gt;space dementia. &lt;/a&gt; Apparently Navy Capt. Lisa Marie Nowak may not be the best person to make first contact.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RciI_m8AqcI/AAAAAAAAABI/Eq8OgGUvWc0/s1600-h/Crazylady.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RciI_m8AqcI/AAAAAAAAABI/Eq8OgGUvWc0/s400/Crazylady.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5028419610324543938" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I guess she just wanted to feel the power between her legs.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-4046720497973991520?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/4046720497973991520/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=4046720497973991520' title='0 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/4046720497973991520'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/4046720497973991520'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2007/02/out-of-this-world.html' title='Out Of This World'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp1.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RciJ528AqeI/AAAAAAAAABc/5ukt07LDqrQ/s72-c/Spacewalk.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>0</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-8316307381741094322</id><published>2007-01-26T06:05:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2007-01-31T05:19:25.449-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Tow-Stapo</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://bp2.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RbpReKdeUHI/AAAAAAAAAA8/5_c088VSGOc/s1600-h/Tow.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;" src="http://bp2.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RbpReKdeUHI/AAAAAAAAAA8/5_c088VSGOc/s400/Tow.jpg" border="0" alt=""id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5024417912931111026" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A couple of nights some friends and I went to a restaurant on Morris Street in Morristown and all parked in the Morris shopping plaza.  We found out later that parking there was not allowed by the owner of the property and that there were in fact signs that stated this and warned of tow. (Although signs are scarce and not well lit at night) Upon learning from our waitress that they were towing cars across the street we bolted out the door.  I arrived in time to rescue the Maxima, however our friend was not so lucky.  She was approaching her car and offering to move it when they "hooked" her car.  They demanded $200 under threat of tow.  I called the police who stated that it was a civil matter and that they had no ability to interfere. The cop was down right nasty and unprofessional. He appeared to know the tow truck driver and arbitrarily decided he was correct without hearing what I had to say.(This is a separate issue I am taking up with his unit commander) ultimately she reluctantly paid the $200 to G&amp;A Towing service.  I found this to be ridiculous and contacted the State of New Jerseys Attorney General Department of Consumer Affairs.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This is what the great State of New Jersey’s Attorney General’s office had to say: Apparently although "crazy" (according to Robert Camponelli in the states attorney generals office) there is no current law that prohibits private towing companies from &lt;a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extortion"&gt;demanding money from citizens under coercion&lt;/a&gt;.  I believe his exact words were that "the states attorney generals office has no jurisdiction over private property in these matters."  According to the current legislation there IS a law that speaks to "reasonable and customary charges" for towing. Mr. Camponelli (973-504-6313) states that $200 is within the normal range of what he generally sees (approximately 4 complaints a week on the same issue) I argued that the car was NOT towed and that as such the threat of tow unless payment is made constitutes extortion which should fall under the jurisdiction of the States Attorney Generals office.  According to Mr. Camponelli they are "aware of the problem" and there is currently a draft of legislation (although he could not supply me with a bill # or the sponsoring legislator) to address this very concern.  This led me to contact state senator &lt;a href="http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/members/bucco.asp"&gt;Anthony R. Bucco's &lt;/a&gt;office who directed me to proposed bill &lt;a href="http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/2006/Bills/S1000/952_I1.HTM"&gt;# S952&lt;/a&gt;. This bill outlines what I believe is a proposal to have set fees and rates for certain towing services and is sponsored by &lt;a href="http://www.njleg.state.nj.us/members/gill.asp"&gt;Nia H. Gill&lt;/a&gt;.  It however does not address the conduct or rules and regulations regarding tow operators or the availability of rates upon request or posted rates for tow on private property.  Apparently Mr. Camponelli's "double secret legislation" was nothing more than a fabrication to brush me off. In my opinion Mr. Camponelli is a big fucking &lt;strong&gt;L I A R&lt;/strong&gt;. &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This practice of "hooking" and demanding monies under threat of tow without check and balance under protection of law creates a situation where private property owners and operators can levy fines and essentially tax the general public. They enter into deals with the towing companies to share revenue from the tow of your vehicle.   There is no doubt that they are making a fortune off of this.  This particular tow driver even stated that "the property owner specifically said that they did not want to post signs at every parking space."  (Presumably to make more money) More concerning than this is the fact that under current law they do not have to state what the towing rates are on signage or supply a schedule of rates to the towed upon request.  Essentially if they had demanded $500 she would have no way to know if this was proper or legal.  This is absolutely absurd.  &lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I am currently drafting a petition to submit to the New Jersey State legislature. Its purpose is to encourage the drafting of legislation to regulate the removal of vehicles from private property by private or public towing contractors.  This petition does not challenge the rights of private property owners to impose rules regarding parking on their property.  This petition speaks to the manner and degree to which those rules shall be enforced under the rule of law.  Once the petition is drafted I will be setting up a website where people will be able to add their name electronically.  Hopefully together we can stop this ridiculous practice.&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-8316307381741094322?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/8316307381741094322/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=8316307381741094322' title='10 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/8316307381741094322'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/8316307381741094322'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2007/01/tow-stapo.html' title='Tow-Stapo'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp2.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RbpReKdeUHI/AAAAAAAAAA8/5_c088VSGOc/s72-c/Tow.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>10</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-1397263702274451121</id><published>2006-12-26T10:10:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-12-26T11:09:09.707-08:00</updated><title type='text'>I love movies....no sarcasm here</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RZFwRf3gtuI/AAAAAAAAAAY/rQKX9223Hhs/s1600-h/Movie.jpg"&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5012911306154489570" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RZFwRf3gtuI/AAAAAAAAAAY/rQKX9223Hhs/s400/Movie.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;For those of you who don't know me I am a HUGE movie fan. Unfortunately since I have been dating my girlfriend I have had less and less time to go to the movies. This is not a bad thing. It's just the way my life is now. I have always found movies very relaxing. There is just something about being in a dark theatre and getting engrossed in a good story that is amazing. I imagine it is something similar to what you readers experience without the 8 extra wasted hours. You can tell me all you want about how great books are but I can get 4 stories in the same time you get 1. Plus I get actual versus described nudity. Porn is better than Penthouse letters and real nudity is better than described nudity. It's just the way it is so deal with it. I have been known in the past to go to a theatre and see 3 or 4 movies in one day. Since I have been dating the girl who tolerates A.S.S. I go to maybe one or two movies a month. She went to her mother’s house this weekend and I went to the movies 3 times in three days. Needless to say I am a very happy boy. Tonight I plan to make it number 4.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I have my own rating system that I have found works very well. Please refer to it when I review movies from time to time.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Full Price&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Matinee&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Rental&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Wait for TV&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Don't bother&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;The following are a list of movies I have seen recently:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.sonypictures.com/movies/thepursuitofhappyness/clipspage/index.php"&gt;Pursuit of Happiness&lt;/a&gt; - Full Price&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I was very surprised by how much I enjoyed this movie. The story was inspiring and Will Smith was VERY good. His real son plays his son in the movies and he is very good also.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;It is definitely worth seeing.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://youtube.com/watch?v=DttxKIA_AxU"&gt;Rocky Balboa&lt;/a&gt; - Matinee&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Again, I was surprised I liked this movie. I remember going to all of the Rocky movies with my dad when I was a kid. When I say all I mean 1-4. Rocky 5 does not qualify as a movie in my opinion. It was a turd on film. I loved them. I used to watch them on Betamax over and over and pretend to be fighting in my living room. After Rocky 5 I was expecting the series to be over. Never in my wildest imagination did I expect Sylvester Stallone at 60 years old to do another one. Although I believe my initial opinion that he was just trying to cash a check to be correct it is a check worth cashing. He wrote and directed it and you can tell some thought actually went into the script. It is a little cheesy at times but if you like Rocky movies I don't think you'll be disappointed.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0343737/trailers-screenplay-E30294-10-2"&gt;The Good Shepherd&lt;/a&gt; - Matinee / Maybe rental I haven't decided yet&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I saw this movie yesterday. It didn't thrill me. The acting was very good. Matt Damon was great. It will probably get nominated for a bunch of academy awards but it was very long and I just didn't find it all that interesting. They are billing it as the Godfather of spy movies. ehhhhhh, I dunno about that. Was it a good film? Yes. Was it worth seeing? Sure, I guess so. Was it "The Godfather of spy movies"? I think maybe the person who said that has eaten one too many JuJubees.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Other Movies I've seen recently&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://movies.aol.com/casino-royale-james-bond/exclusive-video-features/trailer-premiere"&gt;Casino Royal&lt;/a&gt; - Full Price&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I LOVE James Bond. I am always one of the first to see a new Bond film. Like everyone else I was skeptical about Daniel Craig. I have to admit I thought he was very good. This movie was a bit different than the other Bond films. There were no crazy gadgets and he was less superhero like. You got the impression that he could actually get hurt. It also had the best foot chase that I have ever seen. For that alone it was worth the price of admission. If you like Bond you won't be disappointed although I think you will be very surprised how much different it is from the other films.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0449059/trailers-screenplay-E27932-10-2"&gt;Little Miss Sunshine&lt;/a&gt; - Already on Video but A+++++++++ Must See!!!!!!!!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Warning - Movie may cause you to pass out in your MooShoo! This movie is pee your pants funny. Trust me. You may be watching it and wondering what I was raving about but wait for the end. If you survive the brain hemorrhage you can tell me I was right.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Happy new year to everyone. I hope 2007 is less shitty for you than 2006. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-1397263702274451121?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/1397263702274451121/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=1397263702274451121' title='3 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1397263702274451121'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1397263702274451121'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/12/i-love-moviesno-sarcasm-here.html' title='I love movies....no sarcasm here'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RZFwRf3gtuI/AAAAAAAAAAY/rQKX9223Hhs/s72-c/Movie.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>3</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-780057646273894771</id><published>2006-12-25T00:59:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-12-26T13:52:53.536-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Merry X-Mas!</title><content type='html'>This is an oldie but a goodie. It is the South Park "Spirit of Christmas" and is about 5 minutes. I actually had this on tape at one time but my &lt;a href="http://is-everybody.blogspot.com/"&gt;Sister-In-Law &lt;/a&gt;lost it! Thank goodness for the internet. It is VERY funny.  The second one is the ORIGINAL Southpark "Spirit of Christmas" Did you know that Cartman was originally Kenny!!!!???? enjoy!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;object width="425" height="350"&gt;&lt;param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/xNDHRUnq0zI"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;param name="wmode" value="transparent"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/xNDHRUnq0zI" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"&gt;&lt;/embed&gt;&lt;/object&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;object width="425" height="350"&gt;&lt;param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/BxWDPBIbABw"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;param name="wmode" value="transparent"&gt;&lt;/param&gt;&lt;embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/BxWDPBIbABw" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" wmode="transparent" width="425" height="350"&gt;&lt;/embed&gt;&lt;/object&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-780057646273894771?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/780057646273894771/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=780057646273894771' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/780057646273894771'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/780057646273894771'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/12/merry-x-mas.html' title='Merry X-Mas!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-5926364053723313287</id><published>2006-12-12T05:06:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-12-12T05:42:50.171-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Blind Leading the Blind</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RX6vSHtAcAI/AAAAAAAAAAM/Lyie1ySxeUc/s1600-h/Ray.jpg"&gt;&lt;img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5007632561522896898" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RX6vSHtAcAI/AAAAAAAAAAM/Lyie1ySxeUc/s400/Ray.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;I guess it's true. &lt;a href="http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/16157202/"&gt;Anyone &lt;/a&gt;who lives in Texas can carry a gun. Apparently there is a bill that if passed will allow BLIND people to hunt.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;State Rep. &lt;a href="http://www.house.state.tx.us/members/dist44/kuempel.htm"&gt;Edmund &lt;span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_0" onclick="BLOG_clickHandler(this)"&gt;Kuempel&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/a&gt;says "This opens up the fun of hunting to additional people, and I think that's great,"&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Just another example of the stellar intelligence of a Texas Republican. They better redo the 3 day waiting period forms in &lt;span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_1" onclick="BLOG_clickHandler(this)"&gt;brail or the ACLU is going to have a field day. I don't know about you but I smell a class action suit&lt;/span&gt;. Perhaps we should open up the sport of hunting to other people like the mentally impaired.....wait, no It seems those people are already avid hunters determined to spread their glee. I guess if you can take a positive out of this it gives the animals a fighting chance. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;When I interviewed &lt;a href="http://www.nfb.org/nfb/Marc_Maurer_Bio.asp?SnID=2132684298"&gt;Marc &lt;span class="blsp-spelling-error" id="SPELLING_ERROR_2" onclick="BLOG_clickHandler(this)"&gt;Maurer&lt;/span&gt; &lt;/a&gt;who is the President of the National Federation for the Blind and asked him whether he thought this was a good idea he responded "No you stupid nitwit these people are BLIND!!!!!" &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;Maybe Kuempel will invite some of these people on his next hunting trip. Hopefully they will go Cheney on his ass. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-5926364053723313287?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/5926364053723313287/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=5926364053723313287' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/5926364053723313287'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/5926364053723313287'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/12/blind-leading-blind.html' title='Blind Leading the Blind'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><media:thumbnail xmlns:media='http://search.yahoo.com/mrss/' url='http://bp0.blogger.com/_NhpASDwDRpA/RX6vSHtAcAI/AAAAAAAAAAM/Lyie1ySxeUc/s72-c/Ray.jpg' height='72' width='72'/><thr:total>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-1094647525157721830</id><published>2006-12-02T11:09:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-12-02T11:11:18.683-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Beastie Founding Fathers</title><content type='html'>I know it's  lazy to just post a link but &lt;a href="http://www.jibjab.com/originals/originals/jibjab/movieid/31"&gt;this&lt;/a&gt; is really funny!  It is from Jib Jab so you may have already seen it Enjoy!&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-1094647525157721830?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/1094647525157721830/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=1094647525157721830' title='2 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1094647525157721830'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1094647525157721830'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/12/beastie-founding-fathers.html' title='Beastie Founding Fathers'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>2</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-677207436881660706</id><published>2006-11-30T10:37:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-12-01T05:42:03.266-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Go Text Yourself!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/1600/520813/cell.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/400/949224/cell.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;Let me start off by saying that I am a huge hater of people who lack cell phone etiquette. I hate people who use them while driving, and talk on them in public places. I REALLY hate people who wander back and forth across sidewalks wile tilting their head to one side with their finger in their ear and give me a nasty look when they bump into me.&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I am not against the technology. Cell phones can be very convenient. However I did not have one until 2 months ago when I was forced to get one for my job. I assure you that if someone else were not paying I would not have one at all. I am starting to get used to the thing though and have to admit I am finding my life a little easier than before. It’s nice. I can make and receive calls from wherever I am. That is where my affection for my phone stops. I do not need to send email, or shop, or surf the internet, or download Snoop Dog's latest single (or arrest news) or send Text Messages. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div&gt;I find people who sit around talking about there phone or any of its functions extremely annoying.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Today I was sitting in my cube and happened to overhear a conversation that went something like this:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Coworker 1 – Did you talk to the sales rep?&lt;br /&gt;Coworker 2 – Not yet.&lt;br /&gt;Coworker 1 – You should Text him.&lt;br /&gt;Coworker 2 – Well I texteded him last week and he never responded.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Ok, this is where I begin to cringe. Please do not assume by what I am about to say that I am a master of the English language but when did &lt;strong&gt;texteded&lt;/strong&gt; become a word? Anyone who uses the word texteded should have their cell phone jammed up their ass. They sound ridiculous. I hold them in the same regard as people who use the word irregardless or who say "I could care less." Newsflash people: saying "I could care less" implies that you do in fact care! &lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;When instant messaging first started you didn’t say I instant messageded him. You say “I sent him an IM.” How did this not transfer to cell phones? How is a text message not a TM?! They could very easily say “I sent him a TM.” Then at least they might still be annoying without sounding like a bubbling idiot. &lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-677207436881660706?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/677207436881660706/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=677207436881660706' title='5 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/677207436881660706'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/677207436881660706'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/11/go-text-yourself.html' title='Go Text Yourself!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>5</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-2924329238322184013</id><published>2006-11-23T07:22:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-11-23T07:06:25.091-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Happy Thanksgiving!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/1600/849205/Turkey.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/400/824718/Turkey.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;/div&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.americangreetings.com/view.pd?i=419437296&amp;m=2214&amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;amp;rr=y&amp;amp;source"&gt;Click here for a Thanksgiving Wish from A.S.S.&lt;/a&gt; Have a great Thanksgiving!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-2924329238322184013?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/2924329238322184013/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=2924329238322184013' title='1 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/2924329238322184013'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/2924329238322184013'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/11/happy-thanksgiving.html' title='Happy Thanksgiving!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>1</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-1167428898338351621</id><published>2006-11-17T18:31:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-11-17T18:36:07.523-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Goodbye Ferret Face!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/1600/825855/ferret.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/x/blogger2/8161/4526/400/595914/ferret.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt; For those of you who may not know I work for a large insurance company and was recently promoted to a new position. Essentially I am doing a similar job to the one I had before except for a different line of business. To give you a little background there has been significant turnover in the department I recently joined. This has been due to upper management moving the department from another office to the one I work in, and scaling back on staff due to declines in the business. The manager that had run the department for a number of years was fired 2 years ago and the manager who replaced him quit 8 months ago. Needless to say our customers have been a bit uneasy about all of the changes. Before leaving manager #2 filled one of the vacant positions. I respect manager # 2 a great deal and had a very good relationship with her before she left. Having said that I don’t know what she was smoking when she hired the woman who took the position.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;This woman was the epitome of weird. She would not talk to anyone. If she sat in the cube next to you she would send you an email. When she was forced to talk to you she was very short and you had absolutely no idea what she was talking about. You would ask her a simple question and get a wacked out answer that had nothing to do with what you had asked. Ironically enough her initials are M.A.D. Believe me they could not be more appropriate. The following is a typical exchange between us.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;em&gt;(Enter A.S.S. from left)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A.S.S. – Did you finish the monthly reports?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(M.A.D. swivels in chair to face A.S.S.)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;M.A.D. (shuffles some papers on her desk then gestures toward the computer making an L out of her index finger and thumb.) Did you look on the share drive?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A.S.S. – ? huh?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;M.A.D. – In this department we put all reports on the share drive.&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(Please keep in mind that the department consists of just the two of us. In the past they had 12 people and had kept track of each others work by updating their progress on a spreadsheet kept on a central drive.)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;em&gt;A.S.S. – So is that a yes?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;M.A.D. – I’ll email you the link to the share drive.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A.S.S. – M.A.D., I don’t care about the share drive. I just need to know if you finished the reports!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;M.A.D. – I was at the printer earlier and it was out of toner.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(A.S.S. turns, walks out, grumbles %#^#$#%^% and seeks out the nearest other M.A.D. hater to vent to)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Eventually I learned how to ask leading questions to get the information I needed by asking leading yes or no questions.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;A.S.S. – M.A.D., my understanding is that you have finished the reports. Is that correct?&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Even this was a painful undertaking.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Now admittedly I am not the most tolerant person around. Normally you might be able to say: &lt;em&gt;"A.S.S., come on you know how you are. She’s not that bad."&lt;/em&gt; I assure you SHE IS! This woman has alienated every person in the office. Even the nice people hate her. On top of that she is hated by our clients. I have had to take over multiple accounts because they did not want to deal with her.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;On top of everything else she was always calling out. We do not have sick days at my company. All days are PTO (Paid Time Off) and you can use them for whatever you want. However, you can only call out ten times a year. All other days must be scheduled. Last week she called out for the tenth time and was put on written warning. Now, my boss is a little strange himself but he is a pretty reasonable guy. He would never just put someone on warning without trying to get to the root of the problem. He even asked her probing questions to avoid having to do it.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;em&gt;Boss – Are you having heath issues? You don’t have to tell me what they are but is there some way we can work together to resolve this? If there is something else going on let me know. I want to help you.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;M.A.D. – At my old company people wore jeans on Friday.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;(Boss turns, walks away, grumbles %#^#$#%^% and seeks out the nearest other M.A.D. hater to vent to)&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;He was forced to put her on written warning. She called out again a couple of days ago and he let her go. This was perhaps the greatest day of my career thus far. I have had some great sales, fantastic raises and performance reviews but none of them have given me the same satisfaction of knowing her butt is never coming back!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Now you might be saying to yourself &lt;em&gt;“yeah A.S.S. I know she was bad but it’s sad when someone loses their job. It’s really not something to celebrate.” &lt;/em&gt;Normally I would agree with you but FUCK that! This lady had it coming. I guess it comes down to this:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If you work in an office you can be as dumb as you want as long as you are a nice person. People will say &lt;em&gt;“man she dumb but isn’t she sooooo nice. I mean we can teach her how to do something. I’ll train her again. She’ll get it eventually.”&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Or you can be exceptional at you job and be a complete bitch. People might then say &lt;em&gt;“Man is she a bitch but you have to respect her. She really knows her stuff! You know what? I can completely take the bad side if she keeps performing like that!”&lt;/em&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If this woman had fit into either one of the above scenarios she would still be employed. This was not the case. This woman was the worst possible combination; dumb and mean. The long and short of it is that you cannot be dumb and mean and expect to keep your job.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;If you remember the show M.A.S.H. there was a doctor on the show named Frank Burns who fit this description. He was always reporting the other doctors and being a general jerk. Not only that but he was the worst doctor in camp. When he finally went insane and left the show the other doctors got out a bottle of scotch and enthusiastically toasted his departure. I quote their toast now.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“Goodbye Ferret Face!”&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-1167428898338351621?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/1167428898338351621/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=1167428898338351621' title='3 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1167428898338351621'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/1167428898338351621'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/11/goodbye-ferret-face.html' title='Goodbye Ferret Face!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>3</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-3621727141737955403</id><published>2006-11-07T05:26:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-11-07T08:49:58.496-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Go Vote!!!!!!!!</title><content type='html'>&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/8161/4526/1600/vote.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" height="160" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger2/8161/4526/400/vote.jpg" width="206" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;div&gt;Today is November 7th or for those of you who may not be aware ELECTION DAY!!! That means get up off your ass and go vote. Remember you can't complain about the result if you don't participate in the process. I can't understand why it is so difficult for people to get out for 5 minutes to participate in a process that is so important to our society. Your vote is your voice. It is the very fabric of the republic and it is our responsibility as citizens to speak up. Many people died to preserve this right for us and to not vote is to dishonor their sacrifice. Whether you be Democrat, Republican, Communist, Independent, or whatever, do your civic duty and get out there today. If you are note registered to vote please register by clicking &lt;a href="http://www.rockthevote.com/home.php"&gt;HERE&lt;/a&gt; so that you can vote in the next election. See you at the polls!&lt;/div&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-3621727141737955403?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/3621727141737955403/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=3621727141737955403' title='4 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/3621727141737955403'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/3621727141737955403'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/11/go-vote.html' title='Go Vote!!!!!!!!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>4</thr:total></entry><entry><id>tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-37085153.post-116258200306711648</id><published>2006-11-03T11:09:00.000-08:00</published><updated>2006-11-06T06:55:09.091-08:00</updated><title type='text'>Esta Es No Agua!!!!</title><content type='html'>Hello all. I have been taking a break for a while but A.S.S. is back with his own blog and an important public service announcement:&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;span style="font-size:130%;"&gt;&lt;strong&gt;The water you are drinking may be fraudulent!!!!!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;I realize that technical jargon is not really blog friendly, but respectfully ask that you bear with me and take the time over the next couple of minutes to read what the FDA has to say about bottled water.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“From a regulatory standpoint, the FDA describes bottled water as water that is intended for human consumption and that is sealed in bottles or other containers with no added ingredients, except that it may contain a safe and suitable antimicrobial agent. Fluoride may also be added within the limits set by the FDA.”&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;“The FDA also classifies some bottled water according to its origin.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Artesian well water&lt;/strong&gt;. Water from a well that taps an aquifer--layers of porous rock, sand and earth that contain water--which is under pressure from surrounding upper layers of rock or clay. When tapped, the pressure in the aquifer, commonly called artesian pressure, pushes the water above the level of the aquifer, sometimes to the surface. Other means may be used to help bring the water to the surface.According to the EPA, water from artesian aquifers often is more pure because the confining layers of rock and clay impede the movement of contamination. However, despite the claims of some bottlers, there is no guarantee that artesian waters are any cleaner than ground water from an unconfined aquifer, the EPA says.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Mineral water.&lt;/strong&gt; Water from an underground source that contains at least 250 parts per million total dissolved solids. Minerals and trace elements must come from the source of the underground water. They cannot be added later.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Spring water.&lt;/strong&gt; Derived from an underground formation from which water flows naturally to the earth's surface. Spring water must be collected only at the spring or through a borehole tapping the underground formation feeding the spring. If some external force is used to collect the water through a borehole, the water must have the same composition and quality as the water that naturally flows to the surface.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;strong&gt;Well water.&lt;/strong&gt; Water from a hole bored or drilled into the ground, which taps into an aquifer.”&lt;br /&gt;(&lt;a href="http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/2002/402_h2o.html"&gt;http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/2002/402_h2o.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;a href="http://www.fda.gov/fdac/features/2002/402_h2o.html"&gt;ww.fda.gov/fdac/features/2002/402_h2o.html&lt;/a&gt;)&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;a href="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5768/4158/1600/Image%201.jpg"&gt;&lt;img style="FLOAT: left; MARGIN: 0px 10px 10px 0px; CURSOR: hand" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5768/4158/320/Image%201.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt; &lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;Fraudulant Water # 1&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Remember, the FDA describes bottled water as water that is intended for human consumption and that is sealed in bottles or other containers &lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;with no added ingredients&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;, I’m no scientist but I would say many if not all of the items on the following list constitute “ingredients.” Also, water should not have calories &lt;strong&gt;DAMNIT!!!!!!!!!&lt;/strong&gt; Tap water doesn’t have calories! Poland Spring &amp; Dasani don’t have calories! Please keep in mind however that the absence of calories does not constitute water. There are many other companies that offer ingredient laced clear drinks that do not contain calories. Nice try but we’re not fooled!&lt;br /&gt;Ingredients: Water, sucrose syrup, citric acid, natural flavors, sodium citrate, potassium citrate, sucralose, vitamin C, vitamin E acetate, niacinamide, calcium disodium EDTA, calcium pantothenate, pyridoxine hydrochloride, acesulfame potassium, vitamin B12.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;Nutrition Facts: Serving size: 8 fl oz (240 ml); Servings per container: About 3; Amount per serving: Calories: 10; Total fat: 0g; Total carbohydrates: 3g; Sugars: 2g; Protein: 0g; Vitamin C: 10%; Vitamin E: 10%; Niacin: 25%; Vitamin B6: 25%; Vitamin B12: 4%; Pantothenic acid: 25%&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;strong&gt;&lt;u&gt;Fraudulent Water # 2&lt;/u&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5768/4158/320/Image%202.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;In my opinion this one is even worse than the last one! Unless you live in an inner city neighborhood in an apartment run by a slumlord your water should not have color to it! At least the makers of Propel make an attempt to make their product look like water. Not Vitaminwater! They actually add coloring! Would we let Kool Aid get away with calling their product Kool Aid Water? Would we let Anheuser-Busch get away with calling their product Beer Water?! The absurdity of this is beyond comprehension! This stuff is Orange drink, or lemon drink, or cherry drink, or grape drink………If it has flavor, and it is not soda, it is some type of &lt;strong&gt;"DRINK"!!!!!!!!&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/strong&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;It really is sad that companies think were stupid enough to go along with this? I’m thinking of marketing my own “water” made up of the following ingredients. Water, Salts, Urea, Urochrome, Chloride, Creatinine, &amp; Uric Acid. Free samples shall be provided to any of the marketing managers, advertising executives, CEO’s and other profiteers who have perpetuated this massive fraud on the American people! What do you think of my packaging? (Scroll Down)&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#333333;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#333333;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;.&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#000000;"&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;/p&gt;&lt;span style="color:#333333;"&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;.&lt;br /&gt;&lt;/span&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;br /&gt;&lt;img style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; CURSOR: hand; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="http://photos1.blogger.com/blogger/5768/4158/320/Image%203.0.jpg" border="0" /&gt;&lt;div class="blogger-post-footer"&gt;&lt;img width='1' height='1' src='https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/tracker/37085153-116258200306711648?l=angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com' alt='' /&gt;&lt;/div&gt;</content><link rel='replies' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/feeds/116258200306711648/comments/default' title='Post Comments'/><link rel='replies' type='text/html' href='http://www.blogger.com/comment.g?blogID=37085153&amp;postID=116258200306711648' title='5 Comments'/><link rel='edit' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/116258200306711648'/><link rel='self' type='application/atom+xml' href='http://www.blogger.com/feeds/37085153/posts/default/116258200306711648'/><link rel='alternate' type='text/html' href='http://angersarcasmandscoff.blogspot.com/2006/11/esta-es-no-agua.html' title='Esta Es No Agua!!!!'/><author><name>A.S.S.</name><uri>http://www.blogger.com/profile/15302773270009431905</uri><email>noreply@blogger.com</email><gd:image rel='http://schemas.google.com/g/2005#thumbnail' width='16' height='16' src='http://img2.blogblog.com/img/b16-rounded.gif'/></author><thr:total>5</thr:total></entry></feed>
